Monday, March 07, 2005

Post No Bills

This will be a brief posting, and an incoherent one at that. (In an earlier post, mysteriously lost, I referred to this incoherent quality as "frankly experimental." Anyone who has taken the vaguest of glances at our culture in the last several decades will know that this is a euphemism for "incoherent." The euphemism does sound better, but it has taken on overtones of public nudity and other "transgressive" (i.e., blandly conventional) pizza toppings, and I would not wish to mislead. Never that.)

The lost posting grunted and strained through many of the major concerns of our time, among them Charles Darwin and sushi. I'm unsure what point I was attempting to make, but now we'll never know. Halfway through this grand rhetorical extertion, the computer began to freeze up. Reaction times were down to those of a comatose patient being given a jocular buzzer handshake. I did what any sensible technophile would do. I checked the keyboard for various goos, such as maple syrup, paint, caterpillar ooze, etc. There is always the danger of spiders taking up residence in the terminal. And God knows what pornography fiends do at the printer when I'm not around, shotgun at the ready, eagle-eyed and sure.

Well, enough of that. Oftimes in life things go wrong, and we never know precisely what invisible malevolent entities might have been responsible. There are so damned many. Someone ought to do something. When problems like these get out of hand, they make such matters as Social Security reform and Dan Rather seem trivial, like an accidental discharge from a nailgun into your foot, the sort of thing that the wise man laughs off while keeping his attention fixed upon the truly important, such as : Who makes those odd noises when the refrigerator door is closed?